solosection | F I C : babylon berlin .

2.

The Berliner Philharmonic is an insanely talented orchestra and the day he spends rehearsing with them for his performance of Mozart's Piano Concerto no. 20 is one of the most enjoyable he's had in his working life to date. The conductor, a woman about ten years older than him, keeps everything both neat and light in its tone and the harmonies come out just superbly under her leadership. Elio feels an instant affinity with her. Her name is Heidi and she invites him out for dinner after rehearsals along with their lead violinist and a flutist she is on good terms with. Since they're performing Unter den Linden, they've got enough fancy restaurants to choose from in the vicinity, but they settle on Italian in Elio's honor.

The food is good, but the company is better.

Elio has rarely been part of a friend's group like the one he spends his night with that Thursday. There were enough young people his own age to choose from in B, but he was always more invested in his music than in them, and later more invested in Oliver or the memory of Oliver than in what others could possibly give him. Maybe he has been poorer for it. Looking around from Heidi's beaming face as she accuses the flutist of being lazy with his trills to the lead violinist who tells Heidi off for being all show, no know, laughing because it's so obviously a lie, he thinks, yes, he's been poorer for it.

They all walk together back to Zentrum in pairs, talking intermittently, the flutist leading the lead violinist by the arm and Heidi hanging off Elio's shoulder, about a head shorter than him which for some reason reminds him of Marzia, long-abandoned memories, but welcome back, nostalgic as they are.

"Do you have a girlfriend, Herr Perlman," she asks eventually, one hand on his shoulder, her chin resting on top of it while they walk, having fallen into an easy step a while ago. Then, glancing up at him sideways, she corrects herself, "or a partner or anyone special?"

Of course he can tell what she is implying by the additional categories and he doesn't mind it at all, that it's something people think they can read from his appearance. Maybe it did once, bother him, but life is too short to be ashamed of details like that. He has a certain air about him, but it's not his air that makes him bi, it's whose air he's otherwise attracted to.

Like he's attracted to Heidi's and he thinks she's attracted to his as well.

"I'm seeing someone," he replies, keeping as honest as he can, because he thinks her beautiful harmonies deserve that, "but we're not a couple."

He can't be sure whether she'll understand the difference, but if she does, Elio thinks he'll take her to a night cabaret in the old West and then, invite her to join him in his hotel room with its view of Zionskirche.

"Meaning, there's someone you sense the potential of, but it hasn't been fully uncovered yet," she replies, evidently getting it quite easily. Elio nods. "And what about me, do I have potential," she asks him, craning her neck to meet his eyes as Elio glances down at her. He stops abruptly, the lead violinist and the flutist moving up on either side of them, parting momentarily, only to connect again once they've moved around them. They continue along the sidewalk.

"What does a one-night stand mean to you," he asks, looking up at the dim night sky, starlit, but drowned out by a whole city's light. He remembers hanging in the middle of everything over the Pacific Ocean, between the heavens and Earth with Lucifer, the stars closer than ever and the earth a fall away. What can one night mean to anyone, if not everything?

"An opportunity that may never return," Heidi answers.

"So we should seize it, right?"

"We should seize it, Herr Perlman."

Elio turns towards her, slipping an arm around her waist and pulling her up against him. Her breasts are soft curves against his chest. She's already closed her eyes before he leans down and kisses her, he appreciates the trust she is showing him.

It everything must end, let it end with someone who cares for the state of what they're hereafter sending out into the world.